High School

I don't really know what it is about those four years,
but for whatever reason everything seems to change.
People decide to "find themselves"
and become who they're meant to be or something.
I mean i guess i too went through that sort of thing but still...
and i just think like everyone feels that they are stuck in these molds or something they made for themselves at a younger age.
Like the dumb people can't be smart even if they actually are because that's be weird
and if you are a tom boy you can't come in the next day looking like a girl
or if you are a dork you can't all of a sudden act gangster or whatever...
I don't know
I just think it's sad in a way..
people are afraid to be who they want at a time when you're supposed to be experimenting and figuring out who you want to be.
Teenage years suck.

Relationship Issues...

So as you guys know I am with my boyfriend for almost 5 years now....
and i've recently (last two years or so) been having some doubts.
I don't know...I just feel unhappy.
our lives are uneventful.
He can't seem to hold a conversation without picking up one of his "toys"
(cell phone, hand held game ect.)
It's REALLY getting on my every last nerve.
The problem is I only seem to bring up this issue and whatever else that has been irking me when we get into a fight so i guess it seems as if i am just rattling off things that piss me off,
meanwhile i am legitimately bringing up something that annoys the shit out of me.
In a way i think i only want our relationship to work because of all the history we have...
and that is not worth anything.
I just feel neglected and forgotten about.
And he blames it on our living arrangements,
which i do agree is unconventional since we've been living together since i was in 8th grade.
But still....
He doesn't text me cute things anymore,
he doesn't call me when i'm at my moms house,
he doesn't write long messages in cards anymore...
I just feel like we have really lost something
and that something is what made our relationship worth wild.
It really saddens me,
i'm always mad at him
and he is always just so indifferent which makes me even more mad at him.
I just want to have a meaningful conversation,
a romantic evening....
something, you know?

Lazy Days

So the past few days have just been so lazy
I have just been laying around and doing whatever because i haven't been feeling too great.
But since I got my procedure I have been okay.
We ave watched so many movies
OMG seriously.
anyways right now we are putting on the three musketeers
I think I am going to watch despicable me again soon
I can't wait for the next one to come out.
Also I can't wait for the next spaghetti and meatballs movie to come out!
I have so much work to do for school and i haven't even sat down and looked at it yet which is so bad.
Oh well.
I had trouble sleeping last night, not because of pain though.
It was just the moon was so bright and I don't know just couldn't sleep.
So I am just sitting in the living room with everyone, not really into this movie, but whatever.
Ummmm well that's about it
:]

Surving

Hey,
Well I survived my surgery
It was relatively painless
the IV sucked and I started to freak out because she got blood on me.
I was asleep for the whole thing which was great.
I felt really light headed and sick to my stomach because of the anesthesia
but today I feel pretty good,
well my laptop is about to die sooo
bye
:D

Weather

Omg.
It has gotten so cold over the last couple of days.
Its in the teens right now.
And here i thought we weren't going to get a cold winter
HA!
And i was going to take a shower before my procedure today...
But my hair would turn to ice outside haha
So screw that idea
I just drank the last of my water.
No more after 10am so oh well
I just want to go in and get this over with
:]

Kidney Stone Update

Hey,
Well today was okay.
Tomorrow though...
I have my procedure.
I mean I'm not super nervous but in a way I guess I am.
I am more nervous about the IV...
I mean when I went to the emergency room they put one in and it wasn't too bad...
but i really don't want to have to do it again.
UGH.
But then again the sooner this is over with the better.
I am drinking a shit load of water so they can find my veins and all.
I am also nervous about taking out all of my jewelry
ugh I don't want my ears to close up.
I am more afraid of the smaller things then the actual procedure which is somewhat sad.
Oh well.
I know I'll be fine.
I'll be back to keep you updated on how it went.
:]

Pre-Op

Ugh.
Today I had blood work done.
For the first time ever!
It didn't hurt much but still...
and i just hate the doctors in general.
I also talked with the anestialogist (I know I can't spell)
I have my actual procedure thing on Thursday.
In a way I can't wait.
I also flipped out at my dad for once again being preoccupied.
Oh well.
We're about to watch X-Men 2 now
:D

My health

So i hate hate hate the doctor,
But i was having The worst pain in my back that i have ever had..
SO i decided i would go, and my little brother was sick too.
I thought i had a UTI
But my urine came back negative.
Then the doctor thought it could've been an ovarian cysts,
Which freaked me out so much...
I've never been to the gynecologist and i wasn't about to go
So i was kinda relieved to hear it was a kidney stone.
Although that's not too great either.
I have to change my whole diet and drink sooo much water.
But maybe ill be healthier.
Its 2mm which is not small but not huge.
Well yeah..that's my update.
:/